Fake Scoble

Job application

fakescoble — Mon, 27 Aug 2007 16:06:29 +0000

Mahalo for taking your shoes off.

Awesome!!!!!1!!1!

fakescoble — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 21:31:17 +0000

Mad props to the folks at Pay-Per-Post for the shout out.

I’m soooooooooooooooo GONE!!!!!11!!

fakescoble — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:31:40 +0000

You read it here first. I’ll post it on my other site later. (In case you haven’t noticed, I haven’t posted anything there for 3 days.)

Hey Technorati

fakescoble — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 21:23:37 +0000

Call me! 425-205-1921

Chopped liver

fakescoble — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 18:11:36 +0000

That’s what this makes me feel like. I guess my interview didn’t go as well as I hoped. I featured all my great management skills and highlighted all my previous P&L experience. Seriously, why won’t these guys hire me. I’m asexual, that should help their diversity.

Anyway, Furrier sucks. The fat bearded guy who yells at everyone and whose breath reeks of onion sucks. The “web prophet” sucks. (Side note: how can he be a web prophet, if his best job was working at PodTech.) I can’t wait to leave this place….

Dear Mr. Zuckerberg

fakescoble — Tue, 17 Jul 2007 20:49:19 +0000

No, I’ve never heard the expression, “why buy the cow when you get the milk for free.” Is that something you learned at Harvard?

And what do you mean you learned this valuable life lesson when developing Facebook’s business plan?

Dear Mr. Zuckerberg

fakescoble — Tue, 17 Jul 2007 20:47:18 +0000

Do you need an evangelist? My resume is below:

TODAY

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/17/why-microsoft-doesnt-deserve-facebook/

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/17/rick-smolan-icult-member-facebooker-and-famous-photographer/

YESTERDAY

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/16/upcomingorg-my-new-calendar/

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/15/if-only-i-got-1-for-each-google-reader-opened/

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/15/the-aol-question-as-applied-to-facebook/

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/15/google-reader-facebook-yummy/

LAST WEEK

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/14/my-facebook-secret-is-out/

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/13/the-secret-video-lives-of-facebookers/

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/12/the-biggest-problem-for-facebooks-app-platform/

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/12/why-facebook-why-now/

http://scobleizer.com/2007/07/10/if-i-was-evil/

To all the haterz

fakescoble — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 15:49:11 +0000

I make six figures and have an ownership stake in a startup. How many people in Silicon Valley can say that?

I have 2200 Facebook Friends, But no real ones

fakescoble — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 07:51:17 +0000

I have 2200 Facebook friends but none of them know me. Like everyone else I have feelings that I hide under this brusque exterior. You think it’s hard to get excited about your job? I have to say great things about Adobe, Seagate and Sun all the time. And it doesn’t pay that good. Instead of sending Patrick to a summer camp, I have to take him “urban camping.” Hell, I can’t even afford a haircut for the kid.

So I try to keep busy, go to parties, find people who want to talk to me. But they don’t want to talk to Robbie, they want to talk to the Scobleizer. In two years there will be someone new. I know this. There will no longer be drunk fat bearded guys slapping me on the back while making ReadWriteWeb jokes, nor hot young startup PR flacks for me to make awkward passes at. I am even sadder knowing that I have no talent or skill to fall back on when this days comes.

No one sees the tears of a shill.

Call me 425-205-1921

I have found another way to be relevant!!!!!1!!!

fakescoble — Tue, 10 Jul 2007 22:06:16 +0000

Marc Andreeson is a brilliant man. Smart, funny — he has a presence as huge as his wave of unruly, unkept golden locks which tumble off his shoulders like Fabio. He has done brilliant things in the world…. he invented Ning! which has made a billion Brazilian dollars.

How do I fit in? Well apart from being a successful entrepreneur myself (See Wikipedia for a complete list of the company’s I have founded, funds I have stated, etc. ), I have experience at the senior levels of huuuge technology companies. (like my current experience as VP-level management at PodTech). Therefore I am the best person to moderate comments about such postings related to getting VC money and turning around an S&P 500 company. I mean who not better than me to moderate and disucss these topics? I have met many people who have done this!!!!!1!!!

Anyway, this represents a great way to draw traffic to my blog, which has withered ever since the fourth podcast of me shampooing Jon Schwartz’s ponytail.